


More Than a Childhood Horror Story

by aflawedfashion



Category: Defiance (TV)
Genre: F/F, Femslash, Post-Series, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-07-29 21:36:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7700593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aflawedfashion/pseuds/aflawedfashion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Berlin and Irisa have been working together as the lawkeepers of the town of Defiance for three months. On this rather uneventful evening, they try to find ways to amuse themselves as they talk about their lives and their pasts and resolve all that tension between them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	More Than a Childhood Horror Story

“I’m going to be ready next time,” Berlin said in a low voice as she stepped closer to Irisa, every thought in Berlin’s mind concentrating on the woman whose face was so close to her own that she could feel their breath mixing with the cold evening air between them. “I’m not going to let you come at me unprepared like that again.”

Irisa instinctively stepped away from Berlin, her back hitting the wall perfectly for Berlin to close the space between them. As the gun holstered to her hip pressed into Irisa’s side, Irisa’s eyes flickered to where their hips met before meeting Berlin’s gaze with a defiant smile.

Irisa stretched her arm down, running her fingers along the tops of the knives strapped to her thigh. A simple threat. The corners of Berlin’s mouth twitched upward as Irisa tilted her head back and whispered, “You don’t stand a chance.”

“I will study your moves,” Berlin said, pulling Irisa’s hand away from the knives and pressing it against the wall. “I will practice. I will be the best.” 

“Are we really going to fight over this?”

“I don’t take defeat lying down. Never have. Never will.”

“Ever ask yourself why you like fighting so much?” Irisa scrunched her face. “Might want to work on that.”

“Says the girl who never leaves her house without throwing knives.” 

“But I wouldn’t pin anyone to the wall over a game.”

“This is so much more than just a game.”

“Yeah?” Irisa asked, tilting her head slightly to the side, her lips almost touching Berlin’s. Berlin’s heart skipped a beat. She didn’t expect this move, didn’t expect her to come so close, but with their bodies pressed together, Berlin could feel Irisa’s steady heartbeat, see that her gaze was still as hard as steel. Catching her off guard was exactly what she wanted. It was a play from Berlin’s own book. The corners of Irisa’s mouth softened into a devious smile as she whispered, “I am the queen of go fish.”

As Berlin bit her lip to keep herself from smiling at the absurdity of that statement, Irisa tore her eyes away from Berlin’s, focusing instead on Berlin’s lips, undoubtedly noticing that she was about to break.

With Irisa’s eyes resting on her lips, Berlin scrambled to figure out what to say next, what to do next, but she wouldn't have to decide. Before they could take this any farther, Irisa’s entire body froze as she looked over Berlin’s shoulder. In an instant, the reality that the world was going on around them returned to her with the unmistakable sound of Amanda’s favorite boots clicking against the gravel. 

“Hey, girls” was all Amanda said. She didn't stop or even turn to face them, but it was enough to crush the moment, and Berlin felt a wave embarrassment flow over her as she squeezed her eyes tightly shut.

“Shtako,” Berlin whispered, stepping away from Irisa with the awkwardness of a teenager who had just been caught making out on the porch after a date, a feeling she knew was completely ridiculous. She was closer to 30 than 16, Amanda was her best friend, not her mother, and she and Irisa were just having a little fun between adults.

Berlin turned her attention back to Irisa who was watching Amanda walk away. “Well, that was embarrassing.”

Irisa shook her head lightly. “Why?”

“Why?” Berlin dropped her head, and arched her eyebrows. “Isn’t that obvious?”

Irisa kept shaking her head. “No.”

“Amanda just caught us getting pretty... close.”

Irisa rolled her eyes as she stepped away from the wall and started walking down the street. “I’ve walked in on her in worse positions. Trust me, this was nothing.”

“I don’t think I want to know,” Berlin said as she caught up with Irisa. “Anyway... Where did you learn this game?”

“Nolan. It’s an old earth game. He taught it to me when I was ten.” A smirk broke out across Irisa’s face. “And I was too old for it by eleven.”

Berlin narrowed her eyes. “Are you judging me?”

“Never,” Irisa teased. “But I think you might be trying to start a fight.”

Berlin wanted to argue that point, but she couldn’t. “You’re right,” she sighed. “I guess it's just strange not needing to be ready to fight criminals, terrorists, or alien invaders at any moment.”

Irisa kicked a stone to Berlin who kicked it back, starting another pointless game to amuse themselves as they walked side by side down the unnervingly quiet street. 

It had been a little over three months since the Omec had left Earth, and no major events had shaken Defiance since. With the mines open again, the town was picking itself back up, and life was relatively safe, but the population was still lower than it had been since long before Berlin had moved here, and it didn’t feel right to her. 

“I have to make a confession,” Irisa said.

“What did you do?” Berlin smiled with relief, glad to get her mind off her own embarrassment and the knowledge that Amanda would certainly confront her tomorrow about what she just saw.

“I killed the rat living in Mr. Oswald’s attic yesterday,” Irisa said, looking everywhere but at Berlin who was beaming at the thought of giving Irisa shtako for this one.

With Irisa refusing to meet her gaze, Berlin skipped forward to stand in front of her, walking backwards because Irisa would have plowed over her rather than stop for this conversation. “Tell me you didn’t.”

Irisa grimaced. “I did.”

“I think we have to add this to your official job title now.” Berlin waved her hand in front of her face, imagining Irisa’s title written on an office door. “Irisa Nolan: Lawkeeper / Exterminator.”

Irisa shoved Berlin out of her way, but with little more than a stumble, Berlin fell back into position next to her.

So why did you do it?” Berlin asked. “He hails every week, and we do our best to pretend we don’t groan the moment we see his name on the screen while we tell him that lawkeepers don’t remove pests from attics. That’s protocol.”

“It was better than sitting around doing nothing. Besides, all I had to do was throw a knife in it, and now we won’t have to deal with his hails anymore.”

‘Ah ha.’ Berlin tilted her head back. “There it is.”

“What?” Irisa snapped.

Berlin looked at Irisa, arching her eyebrows. “You don’t see it?”

“No.”

“You love those knives. Even when you were on your peace kick, you carried them around most of the time. Without any actual people to threaten at knifepoint, you might as well stab a rodent. Look, I can’t I say I blame you.”

Berlin kicked another stone forward with unnecessary force as she continued, “The biggest threat out here tonight is that some adreno addict might try to steal my scrip, and anyone who dares try that should be more worried about what I’ll do to their face than I will ever be worried about losing my scrip to a strung out mugger.”

Irisa took her turn to kick the stone forward and watched it bounce before looking up at Berlin, her eyes sparkling with something. Amusement? Judgement? Berlin couldn’t quite tell.

“What? You don’t believe me? Because I will kick the ass of the first person who even looks at us funny tonight.” Berlin knew she sounded more like she was ready to start a fight with Irisa than she intended, but she hadn’t felt this wired in a long time, and she had no one to let that energy out on. No one to punch. No one to chup. Just maddening peace and quiet. 

“Trust me, Berlin, I do not doubt that,” Irisa replied as she surveyed the area around them, her eyes darting from dark corners to balconies above, anywhere someone could hide. “And I know what you mean about it seeming too peaceful.” 

Berlin took a deep breath and unclenched her jaw, trying to force herself to relax. “Yeah, I knew you would.”

“How could you know that?” Irisa asked defensively.

“Hey, I know you better than you think. Since you’ve become my co-lawkeeper, I’ve probably spent more time with you than anyone else, and it doesn’t take a genius to see you’ve had a rough life.” Berlin motioned her eyes towards Irisa’s wrists causing her to instinctively pull her sleeves over her scars. “And once you spend too long living like that, you start to feel on edge when life suddenly gets too calm.”

Irisa kicked the stone forward again, focusing on it like it was the most important task in the world. 

“That’s how I felt when I first joined the E-Rep,” Berlin continued. “Everything felt wrong about not needing to fight for my next meal, but eventually I got used to feeling safe… until I came here, and now I’m watching the last rays of sun fade away on a gorgeous evening feeling like someone is about to jump out and attack me even though I know there’s no real threat to worry about. Worse yet, I kind of want someone to jump out just to keep things interesting. Not Omec invasion level interesting, but something needs to happen."

“A hellbug could get past the stasis nets. Stahma Tarr still lives here. Something will happen eventually.”

“Are you actually trying to comfort me by telling me something in this town might try to kill me?”

“Seemed like what you needed.” 

Berlin grimaced at herself. Irisa was right. It was exactly what she needed. “My old E-Rep therapist would have had a field day with that one.”

“You had a therapist?” 

“The E-Rep thought I needed one because of my childhood, and they were probably right. Lasted about a year before I slept with her little sister. She didn’t take that well.”

Irisa’s eyes lit up, and Berlin scoffed. “Hey, I was a 17 year old street kid. I wasn’t exactly used to adhering to social norms like not sleeping with your therapist’s sister. I didn’t get what the big fuss was about. Not sure I do now either. Life’s too short and too chupped up to worry about that kind of thing. Our entire planet was practically decimated, and they’re worried I had consensual sex with someone mildly inappropriate? I figure you should take your fun where you can get it in this world.”

Berlin thought she saw the faintest of smiles cross Irisa’s face, but she didn’t say anything so Berlin asked, “Not your philosophy?”

“Not exactly.” 

“Come on, you can’t tell me that you never found your own fun out there in the badlands.” Berlin leaned in towards Irisa and said in a mock seductive voice, “Fighting hellbugs side by side with a sexy young ark hunter, and one thing leads to another…” 

Irisa just glared at her. 

“Ok, fine. I won’t press it,” Berlin said as she threw her hands up in the air with a grin on her face. She wouldn’t press it, but she had recently learned that if you gave Irisa a few moments of silence to think about what you’d asked her, she’d often start talking… and maybe this time she could get Irisa to let out her dirty little secrets. 

The stone they had been kicking was long behind them, so Berlin kicked another just as Irisa said, “There were a few people before Defiance, but it was always a one time thing. Towns, relationships, normalcy… it all felt wrong. Nolan tried to make us settle down a couple of times, but thankfully it never stuck. Then we got here, and something made him stay.”

“A blonde,” Berlin teased.

Irisa rolled her eyes. “I liked the badlands. Never wanted to be like everyone else anyway.”

“Really? That’s all I ever wanted when I was a kid.” 

“Why would you want that?” Irisa asked more bluntly than most people would have, but not having to deal with the usual bullshtak with Irisa was actually starting to become comforting.

“Because when you’re twelve years old and already an expert in flirting with men to give you food that you run away with before they can try to make good on any of your implications…” Berlin trailed off, doubting mid sentence how much she wanted to tell this story, but she kept her eyes straight ahead to mask the nervousness creeping over her entire body and finished with a tone she hoped sounded confident, “...the only positive thing you can dream about is your parents making you dinner and tucking you into bed.” 

Berlin already regretted saying it. Somehow, she found it more painful to admit her dreams of normalcy than describe the harsh reality she lived through.

Through the corners of her eyes, Berlin could see Irisa look her up and down before saying, “It’s not weakness to want something better than you had.”

Berlin turned her head towards Irisa. “How’d you know that's what I was thinking?”

Irisa smiled softly, “I guess I know you better than you realized too.”

Berlin returned a weak smile. “I guess you do… You know, when I joined the E-Rep, all I wanted to do was make it so no one would ever live like I did again. That was my whole purpose in life, but it’s still hard to think about what could have been for me.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Too many ‘what ifs’ in this world. What if I hadn’t been orphaned? What if I hadn’t lived on the streets? What it? What if? What if?”

“Living on the streets, where did you sleep?” Irisa asked.

A small chuckle escaped from Berlin’s throat. “You know, when I was in the E-Rep, no one ever asked that question. I knew they all wondered, but they were too afraid of the answer. Everyone just stared at me with an infuriating pity in their eyes and tried to change the subject or they tried to congratulate me on being strong enough to survive that life before finding an excuse to leave. People who never lived like that want to think being an orphan is like an old world kids movie. They didn’t want to know the truth.”

Irisa gently rested her hand on Berlin’s shoulder. “You don’t have to lie to me.”

Berlin looked cautiously at Irisa’s hand, doubting if she should continue, but Irisa was right. She had no reason to lie to her. “I lived wherever I could. I’ve slept on a few park benches in my life, but there were too few officers and too few laws, and lots of abandoned buildings. Winter could be rough. It is terrifying to worry about freezing to death, but you can sleep anywhere, really. Getting food was the hardest part. That was a daily struggle.”

“That was a challenge when I was living with my birth parents too… Nolan was better at living on his own without society.”

“Yeah,” Berlin chuckled. “He seemed like the type who would survive no matter what happened to this planet.”

Irisa smiled sadly. “Yeah.”

Berlin instantly realized her mistake in mentioning his disappearance, in opening a too fresh wound. “Hey, not just this planet, outer space too. Wherever he is, I'm sure he’s fine.”

“I know,” Irisa said as she kicked another stone.

Berlin nodded. “So I told you my dark childhood origin story. What’s yours? We all know Nolan killed your parents, but I don’t think you’ve ever said why. At least not to me.”

With none of the hesitation Berlin displayed over talking about her past, Irisa answered, “Nolan killed my parents because they joined a cult and planned to sacrifice me in exchange for their own lives. I was an object to them. The chosen one. And my parents let grown men look at me any way they wanted. They tied me up. They did what they desired… if I could have killed them all myself, I would have.”

“Jesus. If my parents had planned to turn me into a human sacrifice, my fantasies probably would have been a lot darker too.” Berlin arched her eyebrows and tilted her head to the side. “Well, at least I have the benefit of remembering my family positively for the rest of my life. Everyone always seems to disappoint and betray the people they care about, myself included, but my family only exists in rose tinted memories of childhood, so they’ll never disappoint me.” 

“Berlin…” Irisa said with that unmistakable sound of pity that usually kept Berlin from sharing the details of her past, and she could instantaneously feel herself losing control of her temper. 

“Don’t,” Berlin commanded. She thought Irisa wouldn’t be like everyone else. She thought she would understand.

“Berlin...” Irisa repeated.

“No, stop,” Berlin said as she she grabbed Irisa and pulled their bodies so close that their faces were only inches apart. Their eyes locked as she hissed, “Don’t judge me for thinking that way. Don’t you dare tell me that I shouldn’t feel how I feel.”

Irisa didn’t so much as flinch as she calmly stated, “I just told you I would have killed my own parents, but Nolan killed my parents. I have tried not to feel grateful to him for it because I know it has to be wrong, but I still do. And that’s just one of my many chupped up feelings about my childhood. I’m not judging you.”

Berlin could feel herself regaining control of her emotions again, and Irisa must have sensed it too because she gently moved Berlin’s hands off of her. She expected Irisa to step back, but she didn’t. She stayed pressed against her, their eye contact never breaking. 

“I can’t judge you for how you feel about your past,” Irisa said, her fingers brushing against the back of Berlin’s hand. “But even though my relationship with Nolan started in a dark place, he saved my life, and we figured out how to be a family. No one saved you. I won’t tell you how to feel about that, but it is sad.”

“Don’t feel sad for me.”

“You’re my friend,” Irisa said softly. “You’re one of the few people I have left in this town who I…” Irisa trailed off, turning her attention momentarily to the ground, but as she looked back up at Berlin, her voice came out strong. “You’re one of the few people I care about.”

“Since when do you care about me?” 

Irisa gave Berlin a smile she had never seen from her before, a smile she had rarely seen from anyone. It was the type of smile that could make everything seem ok. “Must have happened somewhere during all those games of go fish.” 

Berlin couldn’t help but smile back.

Their eyes held for a moment, and Berlin could tell Irisa was once again waiting for her to make the next move. How many times would they find themselves in this position and pretend it was just casual? So many people had come through Berlin’s life, friends and lovers, but Irisa was the only one she couldn’t seem to stay away from, couldn't stop herself from getting close to whether they were friends or enemies, and right now they were so close that she could kiss her, and she wanted to, but this wasn’t the right time. 

“I didn’t need anyone to save me. I saved myself,” Berlin said as she stepped back, feeling a vulnerability she didn’t want to let on to with Irisa’s eyes so close to her own. 

“You were eight. No eight year old should have to save themselves.” 

“I didn’t save myself when I was eight. I simply survived until I was 16 when I put on my best smile and my toughest face to look like the girl I needed to be to impress the Earth Republic. That is when I saved myself. I chose to be one of them, and I changed my own life. I could have chosen to become a professional criminal; I knew how, but I didn’t… I was never doomed by what happened to me. I’m more than a childhood horror story.”

“And so am I,” Irisa said as she resumed walking down the street. Berlin fell in line next to her, but this time, there was no stone to kick, no game to distract her, just a tense silence.

After a moment, Irisa asked in a flat, emotionless voice, “What time are you coming in tomorrow?” Once again, she was acting like nothing had happened. Berlin didn’t know how she could always do that.

“That’s not really what you want to know,” Berlin said.

“No, but it’s better than getting into another feud for six months,” she said, this time kicking another stone towards Berlin. A peace offering.

“Look, I’m sorry about back there. I get a little…” Berlin waved her hands in front of her face, not knowing how to describe her own feelings. “...when I think someone is pitying me. It takes me back to times that weren’t so great. And I was already feeling on edge today. I just kind of snapped.” 

“It’s ok. I get it. I’ve felt that way too. I’ve thrown knives at people for less.”

Berlin took a deep breath. “God, we’re quite the pair aren’t we. You think we’d be normal if we had real childhoods, like kids used to have in old movies?”

“I don’t know, but compared to me, I think you’re doing ok… outbursts included.”

“That’s not true. When was the last time you waved a knife at someone just for annoying you? You’re maturing, but I still solve all my problems by threatening people or punching them in the face. Five years ago, I thought I had it all figured out, but here I am with a tattoo on my shoulder representing a fallen totalitarian regime everyone in this town seems to think was run by the actual devil... and I don’t even know what I believe about anything anymore.” 

“Well, don't turn to me looking for what to believe. For a long time, I just believed what Nolan told me, even when he told me I should think for myself…  that was a challenge.”

“Yeah, well, his way of thinking seemed to work for him,” Berlin said.

“But am I who he made me, or am I who I am supposed to be?” 

Berlin arched her eyebrows. “Supposed to be? Do you really think we’re supposed to be anything?”

“My people believe in a kind of fate.”

“But do you?”

“Sometimes… but maybe it isn’t set in stone. Maybe there’s a path we’re supposed to follow, but we can get lost. Maybe we can go the wrong way if we aren’t paying attention. Or maybe…” Irisa paused, looking at the ground like she was afraid to admit what she was thinking. “Maybe they were right about my destiny all along, and I’m not even supposed to be here at all. Maybe Nolan screwed it up by saving me, and I’m wandering aimlessly while everyone else has a path to follow.”

Berlin looked Irisa up and down, almost frozen in place with shock at Irisa’s words. 

“You don’t have to say anything,” Irisa said.

“No, it’s just... That’s not how I see the world. I... “ Berlin struggled to put her thoughts in order. She wanted to make Irisa feel better, but she wanted to be honest. “I don’t think we’re meant to be any one thing. I think we all make our own fate up as we go along by how we handle what life throws at us.” 

“That’s not fate.”

“Then I guess I don't believe in it. I don't believe in anything that would doom a child from birth to being a weapon used by arktech, but I do believe that every last one of us is the product of our experiences and what other people taught us.”

Irisa nodded subtly.

“And the truth is,” Berlin continued. “If my family was never murdered, I never would have lived on the streets, I never would have joined the E-Rep, and I wouldn’t even be standing here right now. For better or for worse, I wouldn’t be me. And yes, I will always wonder what life could have been and I will always wish my family lived, but I’m ok now… mostly, at least. And I can’t imagine being anyone else.”

“But you’re already who you’re supposed to be. You could stand to work on the temper, but you’re too headstrong to be anything other than who you are.”

“And if fate is real, you’re who you’re supposed to be. Don’t doubt yourself. It’s not worth it.”

“But I was supposed to be the angel of-” Berlin put her hand over Irisa’s mouth. “Don’t doubt yourself.”

Irisa nodded.

“Good,” Berlin said removing her hand. “And I think I may have answered my own question from earlier. Maybe if we had ‘normal’ childhoods, there’d be two completely happy girls who looked like us walking down a street somewhere and gossiping or flirting the normal way, but they're not real. Look around. This whole world is a mess. Everyone has been through hell, and so many died, but we're still here and alive because we keep fighting. Those happy, old world girls don't live in this world. They’re fantasies that we can give our faces, but they aren't us. We know how to survive. We are strong. And I like us.”

Berlin tried to picture their average doppelgangers walking through the green grass in the park below the arch in Old St. Louis. They’d be wearing flowing miniskirts. No knives. No guns. Almost dreamily, without realizing the words were even coming out of her mouth, she said, “They wouldn’t even know how to throw a punch properly.”

“They’d be worried about muggers,” Irisa added. 

“Ew,” Berlin said, her face scrunching up. 

“See, that is why I never wanted to be like everyone else.”

“So who cares if this life is fate or not? We can fight to make the world a better place from here on out, but we can’t change the past. This is the only option we’ve got, and we’ve figured out how to survive in it.” Berlin took Irisa’s hand in her own, practically dragging Irisa forward. “Come on, let’s go to the NeedWant. We can swap traumatic childhood stories until we’re so drunk that the stories stop seeming sad and start seeming hilarious… and they’ll probably kick us out for laughing inappropriately at our own expense.”

“I’m not exactly the type to spill my feelings over a drink,” Irisa said, but she made no effort to stop Berlin from leading them to the NeedWant.

“Don’t worry about that.” Berlin winked. “I’ll make you the type.”

“You can’t make me anything.” 

“We’ll see about that.”

**The Next Morning**

Berlin lazily opened her eyes to find the early morning sun shining across her bed as she took in a deep, relaxed breath. All the tension she felt the night before was gone, and she stretched her arms outward before turning to see Irisa pulling herself into a sitting position next to her. 

“Where are we?” Irisa asked, her eyes darting around the room, taking in everything like she was looking for a threat lurking behind a mirror as she gathered the sheet to cover her breasts. “I should have paid more attention to where we were walking last night.” 

“Relax,” Berlin said, playfully tugging at Irisa’s sheet. “You won’t need to get your tracking skills out. We’re at my place. It’s a 15 minute walk home tops. I forgot you haven’t been here before.” 

Irisa hugged the sheet tightly to herself as Berlin started tying her hair back, not bothering to cover herself. Irisa had already seen the whole show, and she was honestly amused by Irisa’s own display of modesty. There was nothing modest about the way she behaved last night.

“Where are my clothes?” Irisa asked.

“That I don’t know,” Berlin said through a yawn.

Irisa wrapped the sheet more tightly around herself and got up to search for her clothes. As Irisa shuffled to the opposite side of the room, Berlin glanced at the clock on her desk where she noticed a teal leather shirt blocking her view of the time.

Berlin pointed at the clock. “Over there.” 

Furrowing her brow, Berlin watched as Irisa grabbed her clothes off her desk and walked back to the center of the room where she started getting dressed like she was late for something important. 

“Seriously, you can relax,” Berlin said. “It’s only 7am, and I have no intention of moving from this bed any earlier than I have to.”

Irisa stopped dressing for a moment and looked up at Berlin. She noticed Irisa’s eyes land on her bare breasts, and Berlin flashed a devious smile, but Irisa quickly turned her attention back to the task at hand as she said, “I should still get dressed. I have to work this morning.” 

“What’s wrong?” Berlin asked, starting to think Irisa regretted the night before. 

“Nothing,” Irisa said.

“You don’t have to be to work until ten, and neither do I,” Berlin said as she got onto her knees and scooted to the foot of the bed. “Enjoy your morning.”

Wrapping her arm around Irisa’s back, Berlin pulled Irisa’s body against her own, her bare breasts pressing against the cool leather of Irisa’s shirt.

“Hey,” Berlin said, running her hand through Irisa’s hair in attempt to calm her. “Why are you rushing like this?”

Irisa looked around the room like she was trapped and looking for a way out, before blurting, “It’s not you.”

“What?”

“It’s not you why I’m like this. I’m not good at waking up in unfamiliar places.”

“You traveled around in the badlands for years. You must have slept in a million unfamiliar place.”

“Yes, and I would just wake up and leave.”

“Look, you don’t have to stay if you don’t want to, but before you go, I want to thank you for last night.” 

Irisa brushed her lips against Berlin’s, erasing Berlin’s fears that she may have regretted the night before. “You don’t have to thank me for sex.” 

“No, not for the sex.” Berlin tilted her head to the side. “Ok, a little for the sex because I  _ really  _ needed that, but before that too. For talking. For listening. For not walking away even though I know I’m frustratingly impossible to deal with sometimes.”

“You’re welcome.”

“And I’m working on that, you know.”

“Uh huh.” 

“No, I mean it. I want to start over with us,” Berlin said as she trailed her fingers lightly down Irisa’s arm. When we first met, you fascinated me, but then… it all went to hell faster than I could blink. And now, even if we never do this again, we’re friends, and we still have to work together. If we put behind arktech, love triangles, and my extraordinary ability to hold a grudge, I think that we could be really good together… in whatever direction this takes.”

Berlin arched her eyebrows. Taking Irisa’s hand in her own, Berlin smiled while Irisa adorably turned her head to the side as if trying to hide her own smile, a smile that gave away that she wanted to continue this just as much as Berlin did.

“Your choice,” Berlin whispered, but she already knew the answer; Irisa was already pulling her shirt off. Tossing the shirt behind her with no care for where it landed, Irisa forcefully pressed her lips against Berlin’s in a kiss that erased her mind of any worry about what they were starting, made the rest of the world seem irrelevant. Berlin moved her hand to Irisa’s lower back, pulling their bodies as close together as she could before running tongue across the sharp edges of Irisa’s teeth. With a gentle tug on her lower lip, she broke the kiss, their eyes fluttering open to meet each other.

“Three hours,” Irisa whispered breathlessly.

“Yeah, three hours.”

“You can do a lot in three hours.”

“Yes, you can.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm leaving this on a fade to black, but I welcome anyone to write and post the smutty aftermath if they want. The world needs more Berlin/Irisa fic in it.


End file.
